Colognoisseur vs. The Bachelorette’s Colognoisseur

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Now that I’ve been writing at Colognoisseur for over four years my readership has settled at a number I am happy to have. Which means starting two weeks ago I woke up to an alert on Tuesday morning telling me that daily traffic had spiked. Usually I know when something I’ve written might provoke interest but there wasn’t anything I thought could’ve done that. I stayed mystified for a week and then it happened again on Tuesday morning. This time my readers clued me in to what was going on.

I got a couple dozen e-mails asking if I had seen the contestant on ABC’s The Bachelorette who was identified as a Colognoisseur. I hadn’t but you bet I called it up on my cable box and watched. What I found was Jean-Blanc, 31, Colognoisseur displayed under a stylish young guy. To say I was curious is an understatement. Who is this other Colognoisseur? And does he deserve the title. In the run-up to last week’s first episode Glamour magazine posted a video asking questions of what a few of the men were taking with them. True to being a Colognoisseur Jean-Blanc showed off the four perfumes he was taking with him. He has some cologne cred but his choices were so typical of what guys his age wear I have to wonder in his over 250+ bottle collection if he couldn’t have made some different choices. For fun I’m going to take on the now more famous Colognoisseur in an analysis and my opinion on other choices he might have made based on things I suspect are in his collection.

As Michael Buffer would say “Let’s Get Ready to Ruuuuumble!”

Tale of the Tape

Age: Jean-Blanc 31- Mark 58 (Hipster Charm vs. Experience)

Weight: Jean-Blanc, slim athletic build- Mark: Old and fat (You aren’t seeing me on TV)

Size of collection: Jean-Blanc 250+- Mark 1000+ (Mine’s bigger)

The first fragrance Jean-Blanc chose for his time on The Bachelorette is Creed Aventus. Ever since its release it has become akin to the mythical love potion no. 9 among those who use fragrance as part of their wardrobe. I love Aventus, too. While I believe The Bachelorette probably has not encountered many guys wearing Aventus there are some alternatives this Colognoisseur thinks might have been better choices. I have to believe Jean-Blanc has some Tom Ford Private Blends and as you’ll see in the other three choices all of them tilt towards the fresh. I think something like Tobacco Vanille or Tuscan Leather would have added both variety without reducing the seduction value.

Fragrance number two is Bleu de Chanel. This is a really solid choice because it is so versatile. It can be used in all situations which Jean-Blanc is likely to find himself in on his time in the show. The only drawback is this is something I am betting The Bachelorette has smelled on a few guys. Bleu de Chanel is the best-selling men’s perfume in the US since its release. It’s like saying you love music and then put on Taylor Swift. C’mon a Colognoisseur should be able to do better. This is where the Creed should have shown up in Green Irish Tweed. Every bit as versatile and less common.

Fragrance number three Dior Homme. My favorite of his four choices going with one of the best mainstream floral masculine perfumes available. This is the one I think has the best chance to make an impression of Jean-Blanc as someone who has something more to him. Even so I still have an alternative Caron pour Un Homme. This is also another masculine floral classic trading lavender for the iris of Dior Homme.

Fragrance number four was where I felt like Jean-Blanc let me down with L’Homme de Yves Saint Laurent. It is so generic. I know any Colognoisseur like Jean-Blanc has to have some of the Thierry Mugler A-Men flankers in his wardrobe. I would think the recent A-Men Pure Tonka could have had The Bachelorette asking, “something smells good!” and Jean-Blanc smiling in response.

I am rooting for my fellow Colognoisseur to go far and win the heart and nose of The Bachelorette. If he doesn’t I at least have to thank him for sending new readers my way.

Mark Behnke

One thought on “Colognoisseur vs. The Bachelorette’s Colognoisseur

  1. This is a fantastic development. I hope the ersatz Colognoisseur takes your advise. I actually might watch this show and shock everyone I know! 

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